Random Rant

The hardest part of forgiving is when the people who did you wrong didn’t ask for forgiveness. It is a slap on my face when I learned that I have been lied for more than a year into my past relationship. That my so called “Friend” was sleeping with the father of my 2nd child even before she was born. It was a slap on my face because I was too trusting, too loving and too humane. I did not expect that these people could do this to me, but hello, nice to know that they didn’t only exists in teleseryes, they are also real.

I was what, 6 months pregnant when the affair started. That he only stayed because of the baby and that he doesn’t love me anymore. Bullshit. What a crap. I never felt so betrayed in my whole life but now. I may have not been the best girlfriend in the world nor a wife material but I do not deserve to be treated like shit. A lot of immature reasons have been thrown at me when we broke up, and I cried every night because I was thinking that it was my entire fault but now that I know the real reason why, I realized that you have said all the bad things about me to JUSTIFY YOUR ACTIONS. To justify why you have fallen for the trap that bitch has prepared for you.

Imagine how thick faced that bitch was, she even visited me at the hospital when I gave birth to our daughter. And WOW, she was with us during our baby’s Christening. I should have known. I should have felt it when the affair just had started. But NO, I was blinded, with my love for you, and my longing for a complete family.

I am not saying that I have no faults, or that I am clean, but you should have look at the mirror and asked yourself too, if ever you are perfect. I have been living a LIE all this time. That I have belittled myself because I believed that I was the reason why my past relationship didn’t work out because of my fault. But now that I know the TRUTH, I could stand up with dignity and pride to say that my daughter doesn’t deserve to have a FATHER like you. You have no balls. You have no guts. You cannot even stand up on your own and make your own decisions. YOU have no right to tell me that I am the reason why you lost interest on me, you have no right to tell me that I don’t know how to take care of you, and you have no right to tell me that, because the real reason why is that because you are too WEAK. You are too KIND that you can’t even say NO.

I am not a saint, I have made a lot of mistakes too but at this point in my life, but into this past relationship that I had, I can say that I am not the GUILTY one.

This is not me, sour graping, I just want the whole world to know what I have been through. I am not cleaning my own ass up because it does not need wiping. And NO, I don’t want him back; I didn’t even realize that he is WORTH something, because he is worthless just like you. A man is PRICELESS when he has PRINCIPLES and he has DIGNITY and that he can STAND UP ON HIS OWN and MAKE HIS OWN DECISIONS in life. Does he have that? Can he do that? When the answer to that question is still a NO, he has no value for me. I didn’t belittle him, HE BELITTLES himself.